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Product Review: Boomslang Ghost Pepper Sauce

11 Jan
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The Boomslang! pictured here in it’s native habitat – my desk at work.

Santa you fucking prick! You slid this sauce into my limp stocking and have caused me days of excruciating toilet time ever since.

The Boomslang is a South African tree snake known for it’s large size and deadly venom. The name suits perfectly. Consuming this sauce is like suckling directly on the fang of one of those slimy bastards.

The heat comes from one of my favs – The Ghost Pepper – with some help from extract to take the heat to the next level.

Hot sauces tend to come in small bottles, which means I go through them quickly. Even though this is in the standard 147ml bottle, I am definitely not going through it quickly. A mere tablespoon is enough to leave me drooling and tripping out. I leave this sauce in my drawer at work and amuse my colleagues with fits of sweat and snot.

The flavour is good – smokey and deep. However, due to the use of extract and level of heat you don’t get much of a chance to taste this one.

I recommend this sauce for serious chiliheads who are more interested in being a hero (me!), than enjoying flavours.

Heat Rating – 8/10

Taste Rating – 5.5/10

Ring Sting – 7/10

Pros: South Africa theme, hot as the devil’s fart

Cons: Use of extract

Price – present

Purchased from – Christmas stocking, however I know you can get this on from http://www.chilemojo.com.au

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Product Review: The Chilli Factory – Devil's Delirium

8 Jan
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Devil’s Delirium and Mad Dog – the two biggest creeps I know!

How fitting that whilst in Tasmania I was able to get my hands on a jar of The Chilli Factory’s – Devil’s Delirium Bhut Jolokia (Ghost Chilli) paste.

I wasn’t even on a hot sauce mission, when I went into Mundy’s to get a stick of biltong (to give me the strength to cope with Hobart Christmas shopping!). While I was waiting for an eternity for my dried meat fix, I noticed this sucker sitting on the shelf. I was straight onto it!

I took the sauce up to Mad Dog’s shack for the tasting. When we arrived we chucked a bread mix into the bread machine, so that by the time we returned from getting loose at The Great Lakes Hotel, we would have a fresh loaf.

With a large number of beers under our belts, and armed with a couple of bottles of Tassie reds, we returned for some drinking games, and to try the Devil’s Delirium.

Due to our high level of intoxication, we thought it would be a good idea to smear a massive quantity of the paste all over it some fat slabs of our fresh bread.

The Bhut Jolokia is known as the Ghost Pepper because the heat creeps up on you. For the first few bites all you taste is fruity, delicious chilli, but then the heat hits.  The only thing that creeps harder is Mad Dog, on the dancefloor, at The Metz! The flavour was amazing though, and I think this would go well with anything. However, the heat is so severe that I would reserve this one for serious chilli heads.

Undeterred we had seconds, and the next day we finished off the jar at a family bbq!

This is an amazing sauce. It is 56% Bhut Jolokia and no extract! It is quite a feat to get this much heat, and flavour into a sauce without using extract.

Hats off to you The Chilli Factory, once again you have shredded my arse whilst putting a smile on my face!

Heat Rating – 8/10

Taste Rating – 7.5/10

Ring Sting – 5/10

Pros: No extract, flavour, Aussie co.

Cons: none

Price – $18

Purchased from – Mundy and Sons Butcher in Hobart

Product Review: The Chilli Factory – Turbo Supercharge Extreme Hot Habanero Paste

30 Dec
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The Old Boy – Johnny P – with an appropriate look of intrigue and fear on his face.

Fuck yeah another cracking Aussie sauce!

This one came as a gift from my mate Drew and was previously mention in my review of Queenie’s restaurant.

Holy chili gods! What an anus puckeringly good sauce!

The heat in this is derived from habaneros who make up a staggering amount of the sauce volume – yiewwww! Lots of sauces get their heat from chili extracts, which means they can pretty much be as hot as you want to make them. The downside of extracts is that they have an artificial chemical taste. For this reason chiliheads much prefer naturally heated sauces.

This sauce has an amazing fruity flavour, almost banana-ery. It is a nice globby consistency and went so well with the pulled pork sanga, I first tried it with.

Watch out though, this one is pretty hot. The heat doesn’t linger too long though but it gets on you lips so please watch where you put you mouth after eating this one 😉

Can’t wait to try more sauces from The Chilli Factory, this is only their 4th hottest or something!

Heat Rating – 6/10

Taste Rating – 7.5/10

Ring Sting – 3/10

Pros: No extract, flavour, Aussie co.

Cons: Small container, no funny labeling 😦

Price – Dunno got as a gift

Purchased from – Gift from legend Drew but he got it from The Chilli Factory’s stall at The Rocks Market. Also they are online: http://www.thechillifactory.com.au

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Product Review: Ass Reaper

16 Dec
The Reaper in all his evil glory!

The Reaper in all his evil glory!

Doesn’t this little fella just make you smile? With his funny name and cute bottle 🙂

That smile wont last long, because this little bugger is hot as fuck, and your ass is about to be reaped worse than if you passed out in the toilets at Arq.

I consumed this molten lava with my signature breakfast dish – Lazy Bastard Eggs – which is pretty much an omelet that I’m too lazy to cook properly so I turn it into scrambled eggs.

Each mouthful provided an agonising burn where I could feel the daggers of the main ingredients – Habanero, African Oleoresin (African birdseye extract) and Scotch Bonnet – jabbing the tips of my nerve endings. The flavour was beautiful, spicy and smooth with a hint of tomato sweetness.

Despite the heat, Rectum Ripper is actually a very accessible hot sauce. It’s intense while it’s in your mouth, but the moment you swallow you get immediate relief, just like……………….. 😉

The burn also didn’t last too long (5-10min) and all I was left with was the mythical chili high.

This one is certainly worth a try.

Heat Rating – 7/10

Taste Rating – 6/10

Ring Sting – 5/10

Pros: name, packaging and heat

Cons: heat derived from extract rather than real chili, expensive

Price – $15 (147ml)

Purchased from – http://www.chilemojo.com.au

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Product Review: Rectum Ripper XXX

13 Dec

I was hoping my arsehole would resemble this paper, unfortunately the Ripper’s scythe had no such effect.

I’m calling you out – Mr ‘Rectum Ripper’ – your promise to ‘send my arse to an early grave’ was as empty as a bad metaphor!

Despite consuming half the bottle (147ml bottle) my rectum is intact (disregarding prior damage).

Recum Ripper is a tasty sauce. It derives its heat from the ubiquitous habanero pepper. It has a nice herby flavour – courtesy of ginger and mustard – and was a pleasant addition to the lamb burger and steamed veg, I had for lunch. However, ‘pleasant’ isn’t a word I should be using to describe a hot sauce! The burn was present, but weak. More of a warm tingle, that came on slowly, and lingered in the back of the mouth. I did notice some minor under-eye sweat, but not enough to warrant a wiping.

An ingredient of note was ‘Clam Juice’ – perhaps this would have been a more appropriate ingredient for my previous review???

This is a quite accessible sauce for anyone with an interest in chili and keen on adding a snuggly fuzz to their feed.

Heat Rating – 3.5/10

Taste Rating – 6/10

Ring Sting – 0/10

Price – $10

Purchased from – http://www.chilemojo.com.au

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Product Review: Larry's Hot Pussy Juice

11 Dec
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Bell is as impressed as me, with this delicious, but incredibly weak sauce.

Despite the enticing name this chili sauce was a flop.

Don’t get me wrong, Larry has made a delicious sauce with a sweet and smokey flavour. It’s made from Habanero chili and also has some Chipotle in there, giving it a lovely dark appearance. It’s an oozer, and is quite thick and unctuous on the pour, requiring some spanking to spew forth. I lathered it all over my rissole and steamed veg and had a lovely meal.

However, we’re not here to fuck spiders, we’re here to rip our faces apart with blistering heat.

Unfortunately Larry, even with your Pussy Juice dripping down my chin I was left unaroused.

Heat Rating – 3/10

Taste Rating – 7/10

Ring Sting – 0/10

Price – $12

Purchased from – http://www.chilimojo.com.au

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Let the Sting Begin!

11 Dec

Hooray! Welcome to Chiligasm!

This is my first post. It’s important, the first time, to take things easy and make sure everyone is comfortable. Use plenty of lube kids. We’ll leave the freaky shit for when we get more acquainted!

I’ll start by letting you know what I’m getting up to. I’ve always liked chili but not to any ridiculous level. I would consider my beginning chili powers to be slightly above average. I take average to be someone who can add Tabasco to stuff without any real drama, but a few too many drips, and they are reaching for the milk carton.

Recently I started adding more and more chili to my food and found my tolerance to be ever improving, so I thought  – why not have a real crack at this?

So how am I approaching it? Basically I am adding something hot to all meals. Whether this be a sauce, powder or fresh item doesn’t really matter, as long as I am consistently increasing the heat.

I’ll use this blog to document the journey: the good, the bad and the downright filthy!

Stay tuned for my first product review tomorrow.

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